How Sleep Develops: Toddlerhood (1-3 Years)

wake up and not know how to get back down.

• Language Explosion: The toddler brain is a sponge for language. As they start to understand more and express themselves with words, their minds are working overtime, even during sleep. This can lead to more night wakings, talking in their sleep, or even calling out for you more frequently.
• Separation Anxiety: Around 18 months, many toddlers experience a peak in separation anxiety. They understand that you are a separate person, and when you leave, you are gone. This can make bedtime a source of intense anxiety, as they don't want you to leave them alone in the dark.
• Imagination and Fears: As your toddler's imagination blossoms, so does their capacity for fear. The dark can suddenly become a scary place, filled with monsters under the bed [blocked] or shadows in the corner. These fears are very real to your child and can be a major source of bedtime resistance and night wakings.

Understanding that these developmental milestones are temporary and a normal part of your child's growth can help you respond with patience and empathy. This isn't a sleep regression in the sense that your child has forgotten how to sleep; it's a temporary disruption caused by their incredible brain development. Your role is to be their calm, consistent anchor, guiding them through these changes while maintaining healthy sleep habits.

Toddler Sleep at a Glance: Recommended Averages

These are averages and every child is different. The best indicator is a happy, well-rested child.

What the Research Says

As a pediatric sleep consultant, I ground my advice in scientific research. Here’s a look at what the evidence tells us about toddler sleep:

1. The Importance of a Consistent Bedtime Routine: Research by Dr. Jodi Mindell, a leading authority on pediatric sleep, has shown that a consistent bedtime routine is associated with better sleep outcomes in young children. A 2009 study published in the journal Sleep found that a nightly routine can help children fall asleep faster, wake up less during the night, and sleep for longer stretches. The key is consistency and a predictable sequence of events that signal to your child’s body and brain that it’s time to wind down.

2. Sleep and Emotional Regulation: Dr. Avi Sadeh's research has highlighted the crucial link between sleep and a child's emotional well-being. His work demonstrates that sleep-deprived toddlers are more likely to be irritable, have more tantrums, and struggle with emotional regulation. A well-rested toddler is a happier, more resilient toddler.

3. The Impact of Screen Time: Dr. Judith Owens, another prominent researcher in pediatric sleep, has conducted studies on the effects of screen time on sleep. Her research, and that of many others, has shown that exposure to screens (TVs, tablets, phones) before bed can interfere with a child's ability to fall asleep. The blue light emitted from screens can suppress the production of melatonin, the hormone that regulates sleep-wake cycles.

4. Behavioral Interventions for Sleep Problems: Dr. Harriet Hiscock's research has focused on the effectiveness of behavioral interventions for common toddler sleep problems. Her work has shown that strategies like graduated extinction (also known as the Ferber method) can be highly effective in teaching toddlers to self-soothe and fall asleep independently. These interventions are not about letting a child cry it out indefinitely, but about providing them with the opportunity to learn a new skill with your loving support.

5. The Role of Naps: Research by Dr. Sophie Galland and others has emphasized the importance of naps for toddlers. Naps are not just a break for parents; they are essential for a toddler's cognitive development, memory consolidation, and mood regulation. Dropping the nap too early can lead to an overtired and dysregulated child.

Try This Tonight

Here are five practical steps you can take tonight to improve your toddler's sleep:

1. Create a Rock-Solid Bedtime Routine: If you don't have a bedtime routine, start one tonight. If you have one, make it even more consistent. The routine should be 20-30 minutes long and include a sequence of calming activities, such as a warm bath, putting on pajamas, brushing teeth, reading a book, and a final cuddle and song. The key is to do the same things in the same order every single night.

2. Optimize the Sleep Environment: Make sure your toddler's room is a sleep sanctuary. It should be dark, cool, and quiet. Use blackout curtains to block out any light, a white noise machine to mask any disruptive sounds, and keep the temperature between 68-72 degrees Fahrenheit (20-22 degrees Celsius).

3. Set Clear and Consistent Boundaries: Toddlers are masters of negotiation, especially at bedtime. It's important to set clear and consistent boundaries and stick to them. If you have a rule about staying in bed after lights out, enforce it calmly and consistently every single time. This is not about being a drill sergeant, but about providing your child with the predictability and security they need to feel safe and relaxed.

4. Connect Before You Direct: Bedtime can be a time of connection, not just a time for a power struggle. Spend a few minutes of one-on-one time with your toddler before you even start the bedtime routine. This could be playing a quiet game, reading a book, or just cuddling on the couch. Filling up their connection cup before asking them to separate from you for the night can make a world of difference.

5. Be a Sleep Detective: If your toddler is suddenly struggling with sleep, put on your detective hat. Is there a new developmental milestone they are working on? Are they getting enough physical activity during the day? Is their nap too long or too late in the day? Is there a new stressor in their life? Keeping a sleep log for a few days can help you identify patterns and potential culprits.

Common Questions Parents Ask

1. My toddler keeps getting out of their bed. What should I do?

This is a classic toddler move! The key is a calm, consistent, and boring response. The first time they get out, you say, "It's time for sleep," and lead them back to bed. The second time, you say, "Time for sleep," and lead them back. The third time, you say nothing and just lead them back. You may have to do this 50 times the first night, but if you are consistent, your toddler will learn that getting out of bed is not a fun game.

2. When should my toddler transition from a crib to a bed?

I recommend keeping your toddler in a crib for as long as safely possible. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends transitioning to a toddler bed when the child is 35 inches (89 cm) tall, or when the height of the side rail is less than three-quarters of their height. For most toddlers, this is between the ages of 2.5 and 3.5. Moving to a bed too early can lead to a whole new set of sleep challenges.

3. My toddler is terrified of the dark. What can I do?

First, validate their fears. Say, "I know you feel scared of the dark, and I am here to help you feel safe." Use a dim, red-toned night light, as red light is less disruptive to melatonin production. You can also do "monster spray" (a spray bottle with water and a drop of lavender essential oil) to spray away the monsters before bed. And make sure there are no scary shows or books before bedtime.

4. Is it too late to sleep train my toddler?

It is never too late to improve your child's sleep! While it can be more challenging to sleep train a toddler than an infant, it is absolutely possible. The key is to have a clear, consistent plan and to be prepared for some protest. Toddlers are smart, and they will test the new boundaries. But with consistency and a loving approach, you can teach your toddler the skills they need to sleep well.

5. How do I know if my toddler is getting enough sleep?

Look at their mood and behavior during the day. A well-rested toddler is generally happy, playful, and able to handle the normal frustrations of toddlerhood. If your toddler is cranky, hyperactive, or falling asleep on short car rides, they are likely not getting enough sleep.

You're Not Alone in This

Navigating the world of toddler sleep can feel overwhelming, but you are not alone. Every parent has been there. Remember that this is a phase, and with patience, consistency, and a whole lot of love, you and your toddler will get through it.

If you're feeling lost and need a personalized roadmap to better sleep, we at RestWell are here to help. We offer one-on-one consultations and create customized sleep plans that fit your family's unique needs and values. You don't have to do this alone. Reach out today and let us help you find the path to more restful mornings.

RestWell Resources: toddler bedtime solutions [blocked]

---

Related Articles

Explore more evidence-based sleep guidance from RestWell:

• How Sleep Develops: 6-12 Months - Building Independent Sleep [blocked]
• Toddler Sleep Challenges and Solutions [blocked]
• The 18-Month Sleep Regression: Independence Meets Separation Anxiety [blocked]
• Why Your Toddler Keeps Getting Out of Bed (And What Works) [blocked]
• Night Terrors vs. Nightmares: How to Tell the Difference and What to Do [blocked]

References & Further Reading

1. American Academy of Sleep Medicine (endorsed by AAP), "Recommended Amount of Sleep for Pediatric Populations," 2016. Read more
2. Carson, M. et al., "Exploratory study of bedtime resistance in toddlers," European Journal of Pediatrics, 2025. Read more
3. Liu, J. et al., "Childhood sleep: physical, cognitive, and behavioral consequences," Frontiers in Pediatrics, 2022. Read more
4. Penn State University, "Consistent bedtime linked with better child emotion and behavior," 2024. Read more